FINE! I will be the first to admit that I have officially became the worst blogger in the world. However, in my defense it is because I have been WORKING. Working on projects for clients, working within my networking group, working within my tourism network, working on trying to relax (who knew that was work) and working on paying off debt…. and most importantly, I’ve been busy trying to work ….. IT.
What is IT? That I don’t know. I feel like it alludes me. I broke up with B-rock back in the spring & I really relished being single in the beginning. I loved taking over the bed & sleeping starfish. I loved not having to make set plans but rather deciding at 8pm on a Saturday night which friends I want to hang out with. My friends that is. You know, the interesting ones that I actually enjoy hanging out with.
(Ok, I’ll say it. I didn’t like his friends.. THERE .. I’ve said it. Not all of them. Some of them I do like & could see myself being friends with. However, there is one individual that I really want to punch in the jeans & yell: “YOU’RE AN ANNOYING FCK! IT’S NOT ABOUT YOU!!!!!!!” Yes, I know, it’s not about me either but I think it is on my birthday. I’m not really excited on that day driving his friend around looking for food because he invited himself over after dinner and is now hungry and then putting me in a cab b/c B-rock has to drive the ass clown home).
ANYWAYS… I got over the initial singledom which passed rather quickly because well, the summer began and the heat can generally put me in a state so I was looking to date and I did. I was going out with 1 or 2 guys a week & having a great time. Attention was all around. Around my birthday, I had settled into casually dating someone that ended rather…. well, bumpy. (All of these mentions will have to get sorted out in other posts.. think of this if you will as a re-introduction).
However, since Casual Bump…. nothing. Zero. Zilch, Nada….. Nooooothing. I’m like the plague. Everyone is trying to avoid me.
I feel like when I open my legs, all you can hear is “pah” (the dust being emitted from my vacant storage unit.)
So I can only assume one thing…. I’ve lost IT.
IT is gone.
It is misplaced.
It is hibernating for the winter & I’m not going to see it til spring?
So in effort to raise my IT factor (or lack of a better word). I am trying to go out. To leave my computer. To leave my tiny apartment & to have blog worthy experiences… you know what I’ve learned?
I got older & guys became more stupid.
I didn’t think it was possible. On both accounts really. First of all, I never thought I would be this age which will remain a secret. We all know I turned 30 at one point and the rest is just ancillary aging that is moot. Secondly, I didn’t think guys, as a whole, could become more stupid.
I went out for ’32 year old virgin’s’ bday & the drinks were flowing & some of us decided.. YES! let’s keep the party going so we found ourselves at Doolins (my 2nd nite in a row in fact). There I am walking the room with K-dog, when i see a cute guy & so I smile. (At least I’m confident… don’t know where it came from, quite possibly from the bottom of a bottle of wine) and we chat. He’s cute and I’m realizing it isn’t just beer goggles. Then he asks me: what are you doing for the rest of the nite?
I don’t know how to answer this as it’s 2:30am and I do understand what he’s getting at. However, it was a little premature in my books. So I dodge the question & answer with a “not sure” (a smoother guy would at least try to get food of some sort). So we chat. He then asks if I want to come to North Van as this is where he lives. (with my luck he’d be B-rock’s neighbor). I am reluctant.
And then he says:
what? you can take the seabus home in the morning.
Thanks dude. You know how to woo a girl. I declined. I think I mocked him and he went home.
While I was wondering if that just happened, I was also being stalked by a guy who kept informing me he was a sagitarius. K-dog pointed out he was into me which I had gathered that after the FOURTH time he stalked by & informed me of his sign. Aside from the fact he was utterly creepy, well…nothing, he was utterly creepy.
I then looked at the next table & another guy smiled & we started talking. Oddly enough, they were T-town guys… many years behind me. but T-town guys.
I could hear “Dirty Cougar” being chanted in my ears. (maybe that was just Harkness) but I’m trying to be open minded & FUN so I continued the conversation. He too wanted to know if I would take him home but the twist was that his friend wanted to know if I would take them BOTH home…. um.
no
What kills me is that this is all within five minutes of meeting these guys. Do men not have to work for it anymore? do they just point to a girl & say you and she gives it up?
My friends have noticed over this past summer that girls in Vancouver as a whole have become skanky or is it that we have become more prudent? I highly doubt the latter for the fact we were always slutty but at least we made them try for it.
Anyways, I believe they quickly realized that the gang bang wouldn’t happen but we decided to get some chinese food and from stage right, enters the drunk insecure friend.
There was a third member of their group that had been absent during all the almost witty banter. We’ll call him ‘Fat Guy’ mostly because I’m not feeling all that creative at this point.
Fat Guy wants to know who I was. Fat Guy wanted to know why i was there. Fat Guy wanted to know if I liked him and Fat Guy wouldn’t stop trying to hug me.
Hey, I like fat people like the rest of them but there comes a point in a drunk conversation where you have to say: STOP TRYING TO HOLD ME, I’M WALKING & TALKING TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Well, this pissed off Fat Guy (I didn’t say exactly that but I did try to walk with some space between us). This pissed him off & like a 14 year old girl that isn’t getting enough attention and he threw a somewhat hissy fit. He was mad that I wasn’t paying attention to him or he felt I didn’t like him enough, that he kept pulling cute guy over to talk & wonder why I was there and didn’t want me to listen. Seriously…. he pouted…. for real.
It was weird. I kept walking & tag along (the one that wanted the 3some) had tried to keep me interested in their group but I had enough. I told him that this was BS & i was going home. His defense was that it was only half BS (still too much) and he relented & I went home.
What I would like to know…. Are these my options?