There’s nothing worse then waking up on your couch in a genie outfit with plastic tits stuck to your chest… (Unfortunately, this is how I began the weekend.)
So I was presented with an opportunity to go to a ‘secret halloween party’ last night. Turns out the undisclosed location wasn’t so secret. Lady had invited me to a party where we were to meet and then at 1030 head to the secret location. I was told that yes, I could cab home alone if needed to & that it was a private place with a public function… Yes, we went to the Annual Vancouver Yacht Club Halloween Party.
Because I haven’t cared to make a new costume this year, I recycled my last year’s costume of “I Dream of Jeannie”. I put it on & couldn’t figure out how I had the balls to wear it last year and then remembered I drank a bottle of gin first… Quick to my aid, the hosts of party location #1 filled me with lots-o punch. (insert obvious foreshadowing)
So needless to say when approached by a tall pirate and asked “So, do you race?” I could only look at him quizzically… (I had yet to piece together that he means yachts as I’m at the yacht club). So I ask “Do you?” (good one, Leanne)… and yes, yes he does. Robson, the pirate, is a yacht racer.. but before he could continue I managed to yell out “Hey Magnum…… “ as dude walked by.
He stopped to chat with us. Turns out people don’t know what he was even though it’s written on his hat. I commented that perhaps it’s because his jeans weren’t tight enough and then went to play with the chest hair he had put inside his shirt. Robson stood there and stared at us adding to the conversation here and there. Finally Magnum moved on.
Robson then asked me “Did you know that guy?”.
I laugh and say no.
“So do you just yell at strangers?”…
Yes. Yes I do Robson. I also make fun of guys named Robson that race yachts because I didn’t realize stereotypes like you actually existed in the world but I didn’t. I just asked if I could call him Rob.
In hindsight the pirate costume wasn’t really that far of a stretch for the sea fairing guy that he is. Gaylord wants him to find a really fat friend next hallowe’en that could be John Candy & then they could have a yacht race that John Candy always wins.
I may not have made fun of guys named Robson but I did tackle strange guys dressed up as Sumo Wrestlers. Which I really can’t take the blame for. You can’t dress up as a sumo wrestler & not expect to be tackled… by me.
Actually I never really jumped on him (til later….. easy, it was a piggy back) but I was dancing with the girls and they commented on his costume so we of course we grabbed at it.. which he didn’t find endearing… nor did he find the numerous chest bumps I kept running at him with endearing either.
I don’t know what turned him around.. It may have been when I heard he won best costume so went to grab him & he didn’t care to collect. So I so eloquently put it “Suck it up, and get your freaking prize”. or something… I actually don’t remember exactly what I said but we both paused & looked at eachother. He smirked and told me only because I said yada yada that he would go up there…. Awesome. I really am yelling at strangers.
It’s after he left and I turned around and saw Shark bite (insert new character) dressed as Batman that I find out Sumo is one of his best friends. Great! now we can take pictures of me biting Sumo’s chest or tackling him from behind… can’t wait for those to be tagged on Facebook.
It wasn’t til the end of the night when I was dancing with him that I had my best moment. His costume had deflated (I hope it’s not because of me), and had it tied around his waist. He asks me, “you may not want to but do you know anyone that wants to dance?” um.. or I could? Again the specifics are fuzzy. I had A LOT of punch.
Realizing he asked me the most inane question, we danced but this gave me a chance to look at him sans costume. The sumo was a full body costume that went over his head. So now that he is no longer incognito, I boldy say “Oh good, because now I can make fun of your hair” …………. and scene.
