Busy Doing Nuthin’

What you don’t Hear…

Here is an actual email exchange between 2 guys on facebook… Stop believing everything one will tell you…. I’ve been saving this one for a while

Copper
dude dont know what went wrong..just lost interest..been seeing this chick for about a month whos fucking amazing..rich hot, fake tits, bmw but also smart, sweet etc..fuck im thinking of leaving my wife after the holidays..how fucked up is that? u need to come down and visit bro

raptor
Yeah man I need to get away. That would be good. That’s really weird because this girl i’m seeing fits that exact description. Rich, Hot, Fakeys and drives a 323 ci. haha. funny oh and did I tell you she’s 5 weeks pregnant. Yup!! NOw that’s fucking crazy dude. So does your wife know about this chick?

raptor
hey buddy long time, i’m in chicago for training. This town is crazy. SLUTS Tons.

copper
how u been buddy?

raptor
Dude when I see that pic of you in front of your police car it makes me laugh. I can’t believe your a cop dude. FUCK. the shit we did. JESUS.

copper
LOL no shit bro u should visit again soon so we can catch up..also i have a new cell

copper
yo
so she is moving out next week..i need a trip to BC to see some strippers!! can i crash at your pad? hit me up i need your phone # and email address

raptor
hahah wow dude yeah was a little confused because she was still in pics and shit. For sure you can crash. I’m right DT too. Granville and Dunsmuir. you can throw rocks at the ripper bar from my apartment.

copper
money lets be in touch! u have a blackberry too? i think we can communicate via them for free somehow? i just cant call or text canada cuz the rates are fucking ridiculous!

raptor
ya we can. I’ll ask my buddy how to do it. it’s like your number and ping on the side or something.

copper
cool hit my phone up when u figure it out bro..cant wait to see ya, lots to catch up on

raptor
for sure bro when you thinking of coming by

copper
i dunno..fucking soon would be awesome i need a break from this place..only prob is im broke as fuck! i could prob afford the gas up there and thats about it lol

raptor
Your broke? how come? Aren’t you working full time? We’ll you can stay at my place so food and a place are free. There’s a liquor store in my building as well. That’s trouble. Lol

copper
lol ya it is..cuz we put 2 additions on our house and now i have a mortgage payment along with all the other bills she was paying..my choice though so its all good..u prob have weekends off right? my new days off our mon/tues so when would be a good time in september for me to come up?

raptor
Doesn’t matter i’ll book the time off buds. Just tell me when your coming up.

copper
money..ill plan it in the next cpl weeks..ill prob come up on a sunday afternoon and leave tuesday afternoon

raptor
Cool dude I just watched that video. FUCK that must have KILLED.

copper
it sucked ass
so i popped my newly single cherry last night

copper
wtf?
your status is “in a relationship”? u better be fucking single when i come visit in september lol!! hey would it be cool if i brought a cop buddy with, he wants to tear it up and fuck some canadians eh? hes a damn cool dude you’d like him. his pyscho ex shot him with his duty handgun, crazy whore..now he just dates and fucks hot bitches who wanna see his scar lol

raptor
of course and ya dude been on and off with this crazy chick but it’s over. Totally fuckn crazy.

copper
haha she hot though?

raptor
Yup, 33 huge fake tits, black hair, fake lips and a bunch of other shit. But fucking nuts. Great in bed. the best i’ve had. The crazy ones are always really good. lol

copper
lmao no doubt there

copper
holy fuck

raptor
Reminds me of the last girl I hooked up with at the roxy last weekend.

copper
hahahah money

raptor
SO when you coming up bud? this sunday?

copper
I’m gonna try and come up Sunday the 27th cuz that’s right after my payday, i’m broke as fuck since sam moved out..also my cop buddy who wants to come tear it up with us is outta town right now. He’s looking forward to Canadian pussy, i told him how easy it is..bitches down here make you work for it, it’s fucking bullshit lol!

copper
your money
your fucking money..i’m sorry we didn’t talk for a while over that dumbass fucking shotgun wedding..i should have known marriage wasnt gonna last when we got married at a fucking hotel.

raptor
No worries dude, I shouldn’t have stayed up all night before. So fucking stupid dude. Totally sorry. Next time you get married i’ll get there a day before.

copper
LMAO

Copper
fucking eh
dude the ex is causing major drama…do me a favor and delete her ass of your friends bro! anyways im fucking pissed..i wanna come visit SOON but im so financially fucked since she moved out..i am still making my mortgage, but until the house sells im not able to make my other bills..good fucking times..gotta sell my new truck too..i wanna visit asap but might have to wait until this fucking house sells

raptor
ok no prob. Yeah pretty sure I deleted her. No worries just let me know when your coming. Cheers bud.

raptor
buddy i’m so sorry but i don’t know how to delete your ex gashes name off my list so i’ve just been chirping her. Nothing rude but just little crack remarks. It makes me laugh so hard because she prob doesn’t even remamber me and there some guy from Van totally chirping her. lol fucking awesome. BTW are you 18 what’s with the hollister shirt. Surfs up dude.

copper
LMAO FUCK OFF..hahah..dude i wanna come to BC so fucking soon but this being broke shit sucks ass..you should come down to WA!?!?!?

ratpor
ya man i should you have weekends off?

copper
I have sunday/mondays off next 3 months I could take a sat off too!

raptor
Dude you should really drive up here. It won’t cost you any money but gas. I’ll pay for the booze and you can stay at my place. Bang some canadian sluts.

copper
Dude tempting as fuck..I’ll feel bad taking your money though!!! But hmmm I forget how easy canadian sluts are…Mmmm sounds like FUCKING fun

raptor
Taking my money? common dude. serious 100 bucks is all you need. I’ll load up wth fridge with booze and food.

copper
That’s the problemo bro, I don’t even have $10, let alone $100 lol..sam left me broke as fuck with 20,000 in credit debt..nice eh? We do gotta catch up fucking soon though..Plus my one cop buddy at work is bugging me to go, he can’t wait to see BC and the sluts!

raptor
Jesus christ. 20 g’s wow bud. that sucks.

copper
I had about 6G when we got together..Now I have 20..fucking nice huh?

raptor
Jesus what did she spend the money on? Does she worK?

copper
yeah makes the same as me..she was infamous for starting projects constantly in the yard, for example: $400 of lava rock around the bonfire, but she wouldnt do it right so then weeds grow and it looked like shit..bottom line is everything towards the house, and all groceries for 5 years were put on my credit card..all she ever bought was clothes for her and her daughter..everything else for the house and them i paid for..now im fucked in the ass financially..got a buddy from work living with me to help make the mortgage but i typically have about $4.00 left in my bank account before each payday..if i can just sell this fucking house things will get better cuz ill find a place for like $800/month instead of this $1200/month mortgage

Raptor
Hey bud I think your ex got served having to go to court. hahahaha i chirped her. That your doing?

coppper
lol no, her babies daddy

raptor
oh hahaha.

raptor
Dude look at what your ex gash wrote. I’ve been chirping her for months now.

FUck her.

Ex Wife: I have so much laundry to do! Mr.raptor are you on your way over?? I like the whites white remember!

copper
lol

copper
i love ya but quit sending friend requests to random females on my friends list lol. The last one is a secretary at the sheriff’s department, she was like “wtf cotte?” lol.

copper
bro seriously
please stop adding chicks from my profile, none of them are single, they are wifes of my cop buddies and shit man….

raptor
hahaha ok sorry dude.

Ok sorry bud. I won’t.

raptor
Hey man. how are you. Are you mad at me or something. HOw’s life.

Copper
nah bro never mad at ya we had too many good years together. But I can’t have ya adding all the females from my friends that I work with and are married and shit looks bad on me at work….been good though, bout to be a full time K9 Cop and moved into a new house with the gf. Life is good. WHats new with you?

So I went to the Bon Jovi Concert on Saturday night. I need to tell you. The 11 year old Leanimal is disappointed in the 35 year old Leanimal (oops, i said my age).

But when I was 11 it was 1986. It was an era of headbangers & well, the year the term 86′er came from. I was NOT a headbanger. One being that I was in grade 6. The other was that I was a complete prep. If it wasn’t Esprit.. it wasn’t for me. I actually owned a pink izod shirt, popped my collar & hung my yellow daniel hestcher sweatshirt over my shoulders (because I had yellow trousers on & well, then I alternated… yup… who knew an 11 year old could be compulsive about their wardrobe).

So I arrived to skating one day in my yellow dress & matching legwarmers (35 year old Leanimal is a little disappointed with 11 year old Leanimal), and I saw about three girls sitting off on some benches. They had feathered hair, jean jackets and tight jeans on with reebok runners and they were singing… They were singing bon jovi and nothing about them I thought was cool. They weren’t wearing name brands. They were NOT singing madonna my artist of choice (True blue came out that year….. ugh.. still love so much).

They were singing Bon Jovi… you give love a bad name. I remember that video too. Long haired JBJ running around on stage. tight jeans.. all the mayhem & I was appalled. I was such a snob that I looked down on anyone who would listen to that song.

Over the years, their popularity waned a little bit & I discovered beer. I discovered that after a few pints I LIKE to sing along to JBJ and maybe, once in a while throw in a high kick. This love was fully honed at my Loose Moose days and well, actualized last week.

I was actually pretty impressed with the concert. I couldn’t figure out why the boring guy next to me refused to sing along. Everyone else in the stadium was. No he sat there watching.. judging. He pointed out during one ballad that JBJ was reading his lyrics off a monitor so I look & sure enough, there was a teleprompter (we were above the stage). What is up w/ that JBJ? One would think that after 20+ years of the same music, assistance wasn’t necessary but I guess if Madonna lip syncs, he can be prompted.

I managed to coerce boring guy to stand at least during the encore of “living on a prayer” and for some reason he asked me to go to lunch….. because what you look for a girl is one that knows JBJ lyrics?

I wonder what 11 year old Leanimal would say about this.

Side bar. nanz just admitted she had matching headband & leg warmers. I can’t decide if I’m jealous or relieved.

The Letter…

This is what I wrote.

I titled it: Saturday Night

I’ve really struggled with deciding whether or not I should write you. After discussions with several of my girlfriends who all feel I should write you, I am.

I want you to know that I’m not writing to cause more pain or give you more grief etc… but rather to let you know what is going on. As such, I’d rather stay anonymous (maybe that’s cowardly) and rather this stay between us. I’ve been in this situation before… confronting the other woman & it causes pain & again, not my goal. Actually, it’s rather to protect you a little bit if that can make any sense.

I was the female voice you heard on the phone the other nite.

While although, he may be honest about his feelings for you, he has been lying to several people over here. I question his means & everything about him and quite frankly, his mental health.

He informed me that you phoned him. That you were obsessed with him from dating 6 years ago & saying suicidal things & he was trying to make you feel better. He tried showing me his phone to point out that you were in London except that it showed he dialed out & I saw your name.

Meanwhile, he has also contended that his mother in addition to his father is very sick. That she has colon cancer. His father is recovering from cancer (very well actually) but I question the validity of his mother’s health as all the time he informed me, he was having family time, I have found that he was with other woman who also probably don’t know any of this. There are other things that indicate that she is in fact well. (one being she is out w/ his sister & her new baby, i would imagine one recovering from bowel surgery & going thru chemo need not travel). This lie actually sickened me as my own mother died of cancer. I don’t exactly know what he was trying to achieve w/ this charade.

There was something off about him when I was there. He was very agitated. It may have been that he was drinking. It may be because, in my opinion, there is something he is going through that none of us will understand. He played me the vanilla sky movie & said this is his life, got a bit emotional as was upset about other things (family, afghanistan) and he drinks.. a lot.

I’m writing this because on one hand I’m a little scorned as he finished kissing me & then proceeded to the washroom to phone you which in itself is odd behavior, but on the other, I am actually worried about him. I don’t know him very well, and am glad I found these things out early on but there are webs & webs of lies he is weaving. I don’t know if he can be helped. He isn’t just lying to women but to his friends & other people in his life. He doesn’t seem to want to take accountability & if i were to analyze, he is a very afraid, insecure person. I guess in part I’m writing this as I’m trying to wrap my head around all that has recently transpired.

Considering the level of seriousness he is trying to be with you, I thought you should know all facts. I wouldn’t want to be played to this level. You are probably a very lovely person and I would hate to see you be harmed. I don’t know why you two broke up or all the issues that surround you.

Please don’t mention to him that I sent this note as I’m not writing to get revenge but i kind of feel sorry for him.

I really hope I haven’t hurt you more then you needed to be and I hope that you 2 can find some level of understanding. He has some serious problems & he needs to figure himself out and I would proceed with caution in letting him back in your life.

If you have questions you can ask or you don’t have to respond to me as I will never contact you again. I don’t want to get into the middle of anything. Again, I just thought you should know.

I went to bed a little worried. I woke early the next morning and saw that she replied

Hello,

I really don’t want to be part of this back and forth. I know all about Patrick. I was his fiance. We broke up a couple of years ago and he has been trying to get back together since. He has been calling and emailing me, telling me how much he loves me. I don’t want anything to do with him and the lies.

Don’t believe Afghanistan, he didn’t go. Don’t believe about his mother, she’s not sick. I’ve gone through all of this before with the girl he cheated on me with for 2 years. She contacted me as well. And yes, he lies and lies and lies.

I want nothing to do with him, so don’t worry about me. I live in London and have moved on with my life. I would strongly advise you to move on as well. Either way, please don’t contact me again. I really don’t want to get in the middle of all of this again. This has been going on for five years and I’m trying to get away from it all. I’m sorry but I cannot answer any questions you have.

Best of luck.

I sent back: Sorry, I honestly thought I was helping. Take care.

and left it. Actually, What did I expect? was she going to thank me?

I looked at his email.

She forwarded me note to him & said : Look what your girlfriend sent me. Never talk to me again.

I freaked out. She sent him my note!!! He will know!! He will kill me!!! I thought about deleting it, I could. I had access but then he will keep talking & she will question and someone will figure out I was in there (and then I post on my blog i was in). I mark it as unread & close… a few minutes later look again. I will delete it… except.. It was read!!!!!! He read it!!!! He saw & wrote her back saying: I don’t have a girlfriend. I don’t know who this is from. Whoever wrote you is loony.

He tried to tell her over & over that he has no idea who would have emailed her as Saturday night he was at his buddie’s place who is married (f.. ANOTHER LIE). That he still loves her but will leave her alone.

He then texted me: Nice work in emailing my ex in london. Didn’t effect me at all. made her nuts though. Who does that? ur totally fd

I’m f’d? I AM?????????????? I am??????????

You lied to me that your mother has colon cancer & about going to afghanistan. You told me detailed stories of your experiences and I’m f’d. I genuinely am trying to protect her from a crazy person , you. and I’m fd?

So I reply: Stay away from me you twisted fuck.

Me again: I’m at my meeting and have no idea what you are talking about. (I have an early morning Thursday meeting I attend)

Him: Ok, well if it is not you, I apologize. But I’m getting weird emails. Whatever. I’ll just ignore it.

I actually laugh. Is he really THIS stupid? How can anyone be this dumb? I thought I’d lie to him because well, why wouldn’t I. At least I won’t be stabbed that day.
Saturday, I had received another email from her:

I’m not angry, I just don’t want anything to do with it. You have no idea how much horror he has caused in my life. Part of the reason I have moved to London. He will tell you I am crazy or a stalker or obsessed etc. He said this to the girl he cheated on me when while we were still engaged. I want nothing to do with him. It is 100% him calling me. I just want to be away and done with it all. Please trust me.

Do what you want, but it sounds like you have him figured out pretty early on. Good for you. Trust your instincts. They’re always correct. He has major issues but do not feel sorry for him. He has screwed me over personally and financially. He has said he has changed and yet he pulls this crap. This has been going on for years. . I just want to move on. I really just want it to be put behind me.

Good luck.

I am stupified… honestly. What did he ever say to me that was the truth. Finnigan pointed out that another friend thought of him like Leo Dicaprio in ‘Catch me if you Can’. I honestly thing that is the case. He is a sociopath. It is just weird. You watch movies & wonder how the characters could be so off or where the writers come up with stuff. Special K pointed out that this was like a movie and not in a good way and this gave her chills.

He is fd. There is no way around it. He will keep doing this til he dies and it is sad really. He alienates everyone in his world through lying and more then likely he would gain some respect and friends if he would just own up to his crap. However, this will catch up with him. One day he will screw with the wrong person and something really bad will happen.

After I began writing this, I noticed that the woman he was on a date with the night I met him still emails him as well, he went on a date with another girl last weekend. I’ve never seen someone so attention starved. It is just sad.

Sunny laughed that she feels bad for the next guy I date as he will tell me his mother is sick & will demand that he take me to her hospital bed. However, in all of this the oddest thing happened. I closed this door & my window blew open.

Other Applications…

I still haven’t messaged his ex at this point. I saw some more transactions between him & her and she sounded like she was reluctant to let him into her life. I didn’t want to interfere with that. However, I had drafted a letter that I was humming and haaing on. Princess Nalini pointed out that it was girl code to send an email.

I still wasn’t convinced. It was one thing for me to find out what the hell he was about. It was another thing entirely to interfere with their lives.

On that note, I gained access to his facebook. Turns out Marta is no longer his friend. Guess she DID dump his ass. Haven’t seen an email from her in a while too.

I found out why he bailed on dinner plans with me on the Sunday night. He had plans with yet another girl (that makes #4?) to go to Carderos. Think she lives in my neighborhood. He was weird about walking down Denman with me. Would hold my hand but claimed he didn’t like being on a main street. I think he was afraid of running into her. No wonder Finnigan only sees him once in a while. Juggling 4-5 women takes time!

Based on what the ex fiance wrote (6 months she has lived in London), he has been if you will… dating. There was a girl he had been corresponding/hanging out with in the summer. It seemed to have escalated to a falling out where upon a male friend had emailed him a few times threatening that if Raptor didn’t leave island girl alone, he would kick his ass. Raptor of course doesn’t know what he is talking about but sounds like f’ing girls over is Raptor’s M.O.

He has a friend request sent to her that she is failing to answer.

Found out why he was fighting with his sister. Turns out before Chrsitmas, the family was over at his parents for their anniversary & in the middle of the night stole the car and left the house. Because he didn’t have a license, the car was impounded (guess he got pulled over? ) I would assume he had been drinking. Costs his dad money every day it is in the lot. His sister got mad at him & he pointed out that ‘he doesn’t need this’.

Dude has accountability issues by the sounds of it. She called him out that he shouldn’t skulk away & hide til everything blew over & that he should grow up. Told him to f off. (this then corresponds with the email to his dad saying his sister is calling him names on fb & will not be there at christmas when she was).

He said he was staying with friends (this where he was living when I met him?), and was fine. So I’m guessing after he and fiance broke up, he moved home and he travelled. He only had his job since november so I would assume otherwise he is a penniless bum.

He has a bunch of BS with his friends. One in particular talks about opportunities elsewhere. Raptor expressed interest in moving to Kelowna because as he puts it “chicks here are f’d”

yea.. well, when we are lied to repeatedly, we get bent you stupid selfish loser.

Every time I learned something new, I would email my friends. I would fill them in on all that was going on. They were just as shocked at the next new thing I learned as they were. Being that we are analytical, all we could ask is.. why?

Why would he do this? I kept wondering if something happened to him somewhere along the line that f’d him up. He mentioned his dad ruled with fear. Does this mean he was abused? Nanz contended that afghanistan would have screwed him up a lot. His lack of responsibility mirrored that of Train Wreck & I learned Train wreck was sexually abused as a child…. or he could be the epitome of douche bag. It is hard to tell.

I was however monitoring the exchange between Raptor and Ex. He would tell her how well he was doing. He was the man she fell in love with in the first place but he needed an answer. He needed to know once & for all if there was a chance for them. He thinks that they make each other a better person. He would send her inspirational quotes. He even sent this youtube love video to an incubis song that he said reminded him of her.

side bar: I can’t for the life of me, fathom this guy. He leads such a shady life & thinks this woman will love him in return. Part of me wonders what is wrong with her to be taken in again. You move to London & you are considering it. I would assume partly it is being showered with so much attention and affection you start to think it is real.

She however, is hesitant. She tells him. Look, I need to spend some alone time. That if their paths crossed, then maybe they could see then but until then she is going to do her thing. She is going to spread her wings she is getting promoted at work. She is happy for him that he is working hard & doing well with work (i believe it takes sociopaths to work the financial industry), but at this point in time can not say yes or no if they have a future.

She wasn’t sure about the emails of I love you, the early morning phone calls where she could hear my voice.

I kind of want to shake her. Dude ruined you personally and financially. Cheated on you for 2 years. Said you were suicidal & left you alone on Christmas and Valentines Day and you are not sure? Is she just so polite or stupid?

I dated him for a month & want to rip out his eyes. She was engaged & is happy for him?

Anyways, he responds with a “I take that as a no, but I love you anyways. This doesn’t change anything for him. He will be in London in April. Maybe we can see one another”

I took that as a polite no. I also took that as an opportunity. I didn’t want to email her because I hate him (I do) but rather I wanted to protect this stupid girl. Why go through with round 2 of torture? However, I was nervous. I revised my letter a couple of times. I sent it to friends. They think it is good.

OK. so after a couple of ceasars Wednesday night. I fired it off from my anonymous account. I kind of stared at the computer and wondered if I could take it back.

Text Fighting…

I was stunned and pissed. I wasn’t hurt. That is for sure. I wasn’t all choked up about this guy. If I was hurt at all, I was mad at myself for ever having believed this douche. I had SO MANY flags & chose to ignore them. So I blamed me.

I couldn’t resist texting him & the resulting fight broke out

ME: I found out about marta as well. So all that time u were w your family, u were w her? What didn’t you lie about? Fuck Raptor. thx.

Him: I was not with her. Not that it matters

Me: Just learn to be an honest person. You owe yourself that. and I wish you luck

Me 2: Based on all that has transpired I find it hard to believe anything you say to me.

Him: It’s a good thing that I don’t care

Me: then why are you trying to explain yourself? Trying to hurt me isn’t making things better. I didn’t do anything to deserve harsh words. Dumping on me isn’t going to make whatever you are struggling with better. Really too bad you couldn’t see those that cared for u.

(at this point after talking to ppl, we decided that he has massive issues being that he probably has PTSD from being at war etc….. )

Him: I’m not dumping on you. You’re the one that was freakin out for no reason

Me: you kissed me & proceeded to the bathroom where you phone your ex. u treat me with no respect. Seriously? U r putting this on me?

Him: ya ok, I’m worried about someone’s life aned I’m a bad guy. Look I don’t need this. I really don’t care so fuck off.

I actually found it funny that he still is trying to say he was with neither marta nor that he was the one that wanted his ex back. I bet marta dumped his ass. I also have wanted to keep cool to this point so I can say, I wasn’t the one that was bent but I hate being told to f off.

ME: Fuck you, you twisted selfish fuck. you are a lying sack of shit and are fucking pathetic

him: lol. wow.

him: The thing is. I don’t even know why ur so mad

Me: seriously?

him: yea

Me: you astound me

him: ok

That was Monday afternoon. K-dog felt bad so invited me out to T town for Bachelor finale & sushi. I spent the night and after a little wine & girl talk we all tucked in. On the ride back into Vancouver that it struck me. If he is anything like me (god forbid), he may use the same password on different applications. I was actually anxious to get home to see & sure enough, hotmail, facebook, analytics… everything uses the same password.

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